I stand dark I stand alone

I stare from down under

2009-05-14T19:45:00.005+05:30

I stare from down under the skies I need to feel

the darkness inside me wants to get real

I run I run I run to the sky,

bruises of death touch, touch me inside

drink my blood but u cannot decide

do you laugh or cry when none beside

I breathe the distance, the distance to reach

I run all along

I stare from down under Bruises that wouldn't heel

I stare bleeding the dark embracing me

I make bleed till I can no more feel

the dark seems more real than the distant light

I stand dark and I stand alone

alone is all I aught to be for the laugh

laughed behind me too and let go

I run all along

I stare from down under love made me bleed

fear made me weak now fear stands real

stands and runs through me at once

with a 1000 rips from the inside, I don't kneel

the last drop holds me up for I am me no more

for what I was I have no more

define me define me I cry to the empty

but no one to hear me or hold me inside

I run all along

I search from down under why you had to leave

n make me the pieces I need a life to retrieve

I don't know now who is me for all is empty inside

I search the dark for myself to seek

in search of blood eyes lost when I did bleed

I stand dark and the dark stands beside

I still gather the scattered and drink back the spill

but what of the pieces which will never reconcile

I told u I wont but u made me let go

and made your love hold me and strengthen my soul

but when I smiled and stood tall you let go

I fell to the bruises the darkness I still embrace

I run all along

you stood where none did I still sometimes remember

now it dwells the dark for none is worthy more

I let you make or break for you held my key

now I know not if it still stands

for I keep the keys now locked where u dwelled once

now it dwells the dark standing naked

It need not open not exist not show but haunt

huant my heart that now knows a thousand bruises

It stands naked but some heal for you once smiled here

you smiled you kissed and held strenthened my tears

death justifies but not another to dwell

I bleed from down under the empty comes to kill

It haunts my nights the darkness I treasure

wish some lies could please you soul

that without you my life sees pleasure

but lies couldn't make me whole

You desire me to learn that

happiness means more than you touch

You desire me to be complete when I bleed

you stared away long before I was asleep

the dark be darker to fade my soul

for I shall not kneel for my love will not seize

I turn and stand all along

Smiles will touch me again laughter will hear my soul

for when blood wet my skin I smiled

smile away my tears

for the dark fails to darken me anymore

failed to destroy for I did not kneel

I stand inside out have none concealed

for I set you free

your heart no more dwells in me

I loved so close but was so distant

for could not see your tear touch

could not feel smiles fade you

you were but of a different air

Go dwell where you aspire breathe

for my remains are of your empty stare

I know now you better respire

smiles dwell around you and you dwell around

I shall be oblivious yet aware

Stand at a distance yet smile at your stare

for you were once nostalgic love

I walk away for there is much more to be found

I stand staring

2009-03-24T12:48:00.001+05:30

darkness stands not as the condition
stands just a question
do you see the light it shadows
can you stand not lost
but laugh out for the path mirrors
its dark now but for light to be
its hard now for smiles to see
lost is now not forever will be

I stand staring ordinary
as the other billion stares
i stand disappear as steps receed
but i stare not as the billion stares
i eye not who stands beside
but see the distance the light reads
the unaccesible to reach
the darkness inside i question
for the courage i seek to feel
i bruise to stare the billion
from where their sight conceals

Confusion personifed

2009-03-24T12:45:00.001+05:30

I devised and despised,
and tried to dismantle
what holds inside
but confusions diversions
were all I could find
guarded with mazes
front and behind
of words and emotions
where secrets confide
Were puzzles with pieces
that would never collide
more I would question
the science behind
more I entangled
in my own despise
words were what me spoke
but the language defied
hence girl the species i fail to define

Geri's Game - Pixar Short Film another story

2009-01-21T20:51:00.001+05:30

One of my Favourate short films by Pixar ! A must see

Aakhri pyala - raat bhar ghotala !

2009-01-16T19:52:00.008+05:30

Sampat Shetty (Operations Head CGTantra) curses his stars for one fine day he would witness the real meaning of the word High. It took me 2 bottles of Kingfisher strong drank at super pace to define to him with a broader context what the word 'High' signifies.
From raising my voice up the hierarchy to explaining the fundas of life. It was quite justified that, that day was the last day we would sip alcohol at his place. We wouldn't want the neighbors t invite themselves for out party now, would we ?

CGTantra 3d Anniversary Act It out

2009-01-16T19:39:00.001+05:30

2008-12-03T21:40:00.000+05:30

I just saw a news report on a website from News 1. It gives an insight of what the Pakistani politics conceives of the innocent lives lost in the Terror attacks in Mumbai. The person putting forth his view was Zayed Hamid, a defense analyst from Pakistan. The most intriguing part was his reference to the terrorists as Indian Assets, who were diploid on the basis of a strategy by the Indian political parties. India according to them is letting innocent lives be lost so that it can have strong reasons to blame Pakistan for nurturing terrorists, a planned attempt. My Blood boils on his words, I do not expect the politicians to be sane when commenting on this issue however I see no ethics as to why they should force their views on the citizens of Pakistan. The citizens already oblivious about the insides, when talk the tongue of the politicians, it should not be surprising, I see no justice in inflicting infected views on the public hence instigating them to hate a country as a whole.

The blame game takes itself to a different level when you conclude that the so called Indian assets are being used as weapons against Pakistan and a good possibility of RAW being a part of this devastation. I carry no political experience hence cannot comment on the steps to be taken but why do the people suffer. Where are we today when the loss of innocent lives is being used as bridges to point fingers? The Indian militants are being held responsible for the terror attacks when the evidence and the terrorists in custody speak a different language. It is so believed that Indian terrorism is bigger than what Mumbai saw. It is America that supports India in its stance and hence CNN telecasted the horrifying incidents throughout the day, concluding the smart move of Indian Media, How immature and unethical is to think that.

Terrorism exists to prove a point; the other politically motivated incidents stand to prove another point. The BJP wants to seize this opportunity and blame the Congress for their incompetence rather than being constructive. In this entire scenario why do we loose our lives, why do I leave my house with a fear of not returning? When all the avenues of peace have been exhausted one can resort to aggression, would you not agree? It is ridiculous how the Pakistani channels are telecasting these views and letting the politicians talk their tongue. I have had the chance to speak to various Pakistani citizens who are so happy to know that you belong to India; you talk as 2 people regardless of anything. I have spoken to people who are glad when told you are from India since it feels closer than another country, having very good conversations and showing the same dignity we show to them. Why can that not be, why do these views drain down to the citizens and they be forced to think otherwise.

We are human beings, and respect every other. We know what wrong one does can’t be blamed on the other. Let us smile at each other and smile because of the person that you’re smiling at and not what nationality he or she belongs to.

2008-12-01T14:36:00.000+05:30

you die not in vain
you stand firm for your soil
we wont tear just feel pain
let you essence hold us strong
Your courage irreplaceable

your smile dear to many
their love would change none
for you shall not return
but my friend your job was done

Not a moment to tear
but salute your heart was true
the heart that knew no fear
how could it make me break
your courage irreplaceable

Time shall heal the scars
that it bestowed concrete
but what of the emptiness
around us the silence weeps

we rise for blood was true
No drop shall see despair
we hold the cause for you
our strengths beyond compare
for your courage irreplaceable

we shall not let you fade
you stood for lives to see
the dawn, the day and more
but your days had to seize

I know dear son of soil
you wish that time would seize
more tears you would heal
more bullets you would breathe
you said don't fear i be
till i breathe to reach you
no bullet would agree
no grenade, no fire
would make you bleed

My friend you stood longer
you stood with at ease
when your heart surrendered
your gun wouldn't seize
you said i am still standing
when the time was to leave

why so serious !

2008-10-25T16:46:00.000+05:30

A persons ability to be happy in diverse situations he or she is in makes one better than many.

A friend once told me this when i was too fucked up with life. It took me some time to realise how much those words meant. If you are in the worst of conditions and there is some one better than you in all aspects that you see, However if you smile with life more and fight but also know how to keep yourself happy, i would see you to be better than him or her, i see you as a winner since you can be happy with all the fuckups in life. Out of your experiences in life you should be able to look back and tell your self that you did a good job when you were fucked up or atleast even if you failed somewhere you learned from it and became a better person.

There is nothing much to it. There is less to talk and more to do. If you can change your strongly rooted habits that make you what you are and stretch the boundaries, you have done it. Advice comes for free, Will and decision making come from within the shit hole called you. And believe me you have to put your hand way down to reach for it. If you can pull it out, Eureka! Most of us keep crying because we are unable to change. Regret for the same thing twice tells you that you are still latched on. Move on, man ! People say "i have seen life since i have been through lots". But these fuck ups don't make you better. How you take them, how you come out of it and how do you let that phase affect your life is what makes you better. we are too busy satisfying our egos and over reacting to things. All the shit i just said is as simple as i said it and as difficult when it comes to application. The ones who can bridge the gap between Good Advice, Self realisation and application are up there.

Not dead ! Just better people.

2008-10-24T19:18:00.000+05:30